Teen Dating: Dealing with Jealousy & Over-Reacting

Yes, there are times when we all get a bit jealous. Jealousy is natural, but sometimes we go over the top. How do we know when we’re right to be concerned vs merely over-reacting?

Your significant other will be talking to other people and spending time with others. Some of those people might look good enough to be on a cover of a magazine. Some of these people might have a body that even if you spend an hour at the gym every day, you still couldn’t come close to looking like that. But guess what? This is normal and you’re just going to have to get over it and trust them.

First of all, trust should be one of the foundations of your relationship. How would you like it if you were constantly accused of flirting? Being in a relationship means that you trust and respect each other. He/she is not going to be by your side every moment of the day (nor would that be a healthy relationship). You need to be able to trust each other and let them live their own life too (which should include spending time with their friends, family, etc).

If you don’t trust your boyfriend/girlfriend, then why are you in a relationship with him/her? You might say that you trust them, but you don’t trust other people, but to me, that is just a load of crap. Even if someone else makes a move on him/her, you should trust them enough to be able to walk away and say no.

If you can’t trust anyone, then you need to sit down and figure out the real reason why you can’t trust. Until you do that, you won’t be able to have a healthy relationship.

There are times when you have a right to be concerned. If every time a specific person calls or texts him/her, they drop everything they have planned to be with that person, then you should have a mature conversation about your concerns (without accusing him/her of anything). In that conversation you might discover a logical explanation or perhaps you were right in your concerns. If that is the case, then it’s better to find out earlier on so you can move on as well. Obviously, he/she was not the right one for you so try not to dwell too much on that. You might find our article on Helping Millennials Replenish Their Self-Esteem After Breakups helpful.