You’ve tried online dating, examined the bar scene, and even suffered through blind dates set up by your mom, but there is still no sign of Mr. or Mrs. Right. Sound familiar?
Love is one of those things that can catch us by surprise. It often finds us when we’re not looking for it, but here are some tips to help you in your pursuit.
Our first piece of advice is take a deep breath and take a break from online dating. Taking a break doesn’t mean that you failed in your mission, it just implies a shift in your current approach. You don’t need to completely abandon your search but just keep it on the back-burner.
Take some time and do the things that YOU have always wanted to do. Maybe it’s time to embark on a solo trip by yourself in a foreign place or try skiing for the first time. Whatever it is, get that crossed off your list. This is YOUR time.
The next bit of advice is to sit down and really think about what it is that you are looking for. One of the big reasons why relationships fail is due to unmet expectations. Some people just expect that being in a relationship will bring them instant happiness and expect it to always remain. But every relationship has its ups and downs. If you expect the world out of your significant other, then you’re bound to be frustrated. It is important to come up with healthy, realistic expectations and make sure that once you’re in a relationship, these expectations get properly communicated.
How many people do you know that ended up marrying their best friend? Instead of looking for a lover, just try to find new friends to hang out with. Look for people who have the same interests and instead of going on some awkward date, just have it be a casual meetup of doing whatever it is that interests you both. Going this route takes the stress out of dating because you’re not going on a date. You are just two people (who might be attracted to each other or maybe not) who are just on a bike ride, or watching the latest Marvel movie at the theater, or on a mission to find the best homemade ice cream in the city. Maybe it will turn into a great relationship or maybe it will just turn into a great friendship, but you will never know until you put yourself out there.
The last bit of advice for today is to keep your eyes open and strike up a conversation. It’s easier to hide behind a computer screen or pass time by staring at your phone, but when you’re out and about, make it a point to start talking to people.
Some people find their love of their life early on and others have quite a few crash and burns before they get to that point. Everybody is different and we all have different situations. It is these experiences that help shape us as an individual and although sometimes things might not go our way, how we react and carry on plays a part in who we are. And we ALL are amazing, remarkable and unique human beings.